Sunday, December 10, 2017

She grew tired (originally penned December 10, 2016)

She grew tired
Tired of waiting
Waiting for the wrong one
One who wasn't right
Wasn't right for her
For her self esteem
For her peace of mind
For her ambitions
For her life

She grew tired
Tired of waiting
Waiting for her life to begin
To begin with him
With him always away
With him always out
With him always misbehaving
With him always doing wrong

She grew tired
Tired of waiting...

So she began packing
Packing her pride
Packing her joy
Packing her faithfulness
Packing her love

She packed it all up
And wrapped it
In her self worth
When she found
She was worthless to him

She grew tired
So she packed up
And left
Left him
Left him wondering
Wondering why
Why was she upset
When all he was being
Was himself

He made no pretenses
He made no promises
He gave no false hopes
He gave no illusions

But she saw
With hopeless hopefulness
What she wanted
Wanted him to be
Even though he told her
"I can only be me."

She had given herself
To hopelessness
Hoping against hope
Hopeful, yet hopeless
She knew in her heart
That he was not
Not right for her
For her hopes were too high
And he made no effort
To reach them

So she's packed up her hope
What little there is
Pasted on a smile
And went to face life

Thursday, November 17, 2016

Stand out!

If God lead you to color outside the lines,
No matter how painful it may seem,
Don't try to fit in!
Those are not your boundaries!

You are not meant to blend in!
You are too fabulous to blend in!
The lines that society has drawn
Are not your lines.
Your lines lie elsewhere.

You are not meant to fit in.
You are not meant to blend in.

You are meant to go against the grain.
You are meant to swim against the tide. 
You are meant to march to the beat of your own drummer.
You are MEANT to be different.

Start your own band!
Write your own song!
Dance to your own rhythm! 
Croon to your own tune!
Revel in your difference!
In other words,

Monday, November 14, 2016

This Feeling (My reaction to seeing "The Birth of a Nation" on October 7, 2016)

I wish I could
Convey to you
The profundity
Of this feeling
I'm feeling.

I'd like your help
To define this new emotion
I'm experiencing.

I just saw "The Birth of a Nation,"
and yes,
my initial responses
were profound sadness
and rage.  

like perfume,
the initial reaction
has now passed,
and the deeper, more lasting effect

I feel a form of contempt
and familiarity,
a renewed sense of self worth
and purpose,
an underlying pity and shame,
and yet a powerful hopefulness
riding on faith.

This movie
and it's accompanying effects and emotions,
is not for everyone,
for few will know
how to handle
the rush and multitude of the reactions
I am unsure of where I fall.  

It comes at a time
when we
cannot cry "#blacklivesmatter" loudly enough,
yet we still receive resistance
and apathy,
pathetically enough,
sometimes from our own.

But what this movie
has helped me to recognize is
that with every battle,
there will always be
Benedict Arnold's and Judases,
willing and unwilling.  
I can no longer blame them.  
like the countless Patty Hearsts among us,
have been brainwashed so completely
that they actually believe the filth
that their captors are spewing.  
I will leave them to their own paths,
and pray I am elsewhere
when they
experience their inevitable,
unenviable end.

But still,
I am left feeling this feeling
that am at a loss to define.
I want to do something,
but am at a loss as to what.
I have so much to do,
but am at a loss as to where to start.
I have so much to say,
but am at a loss as to how to convey the depth of it all.

I wish I could define this feeling...

Tuesday, September 20, 2016

Just stop

(penned June 14, 2016)

In the news I see
Churches becoming
Charnel houses
In the news I see
Rape charges becoming
Rampant injustices
In the news I see
Nightclubs becoming
Nazi death camps
In the news I see
Movie theaters becoming
Mass grave sites
In the news I see
Schoolyards becoming
Shooting galleries


The hatred has to
The venom has to
The anguish has to
The vengeance has to

We want it to end
We feel the need
To hit someone
To hurt someone
But we have to be the ones

We want vengeance
We want justice
We want retribution
But we have to

We have to take a minute
Unlike them
We have to pause
Unlike them
We have to bow
Unlike them
We have to

And remember
That God keeps better records
Than us
He says vengeance is His
He will repay

So if we
And let Him take over
Then we can
The hate
The violence
The anguish
The injustices


My Black Heart

My Black heart isn't broken
It's been stepped on
It's been stomped on
It's bled
It's been abused
It's stuttered
It's even stopped.
Sometimes it felt like
It had even been shattered.
But it's a strong heart
Because it still beats.
Trayvon, Emmitt, Sandra, Alton
My heart will beat for yours
Now stilled
I still hear your heartbeat
And mine
Will continue the rhythm
My heart isn't broken
It's been shattered
But it still beats
And will continue to beat
To the tune of justice
My heart isn't broken
It still works